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What’s Holding You Back From Living the Life You Want?

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Suppose you direct the energy, time, and commitment you give others to yourself, how far will you go?  Click To Tweet

As it is the tradition, most of us, pumped with a desire for change, a better tomorrow, penned down mind-blowing 2021 resolutions. At that moment, when visualizing and writing down those dreams, everything seemed so doable. We had it all laid out. What a perfect way to start a year!

But what happened weeks after that inspiring encounter with the future you want? Where did the drive go? What happened to you? It’s clear. You are held hostage. Your toxic habits are your captors. The ransom that you have to pay is quite expensive that without a strong will power your dreams will barely see the light of day.

And so, for how long are you planning to shift the blame, procrastinate, play the victim card, give excuses, complain, take shortcuts and settle for less? Better still, what will it take for you to realize you have everything you need within you to take the next step?

As we dig deeper into these questions, let’s call out our captors by name and seek ways to free ourselves. 

Self-doubt 

I have a strong feeling that self-doubt is the chairperson of the bad habits committee. I think it’s the one running the whole hostage situation. The way it creeps in, threatens you with your perceived inadequacies, and demands that you dare not pursue what you have in mind or hell will break loose is a typical terrorist-hostage situation I’ve seen in movies. Don’t you think? 

Self-doubt thrives on your vulnerability. It feeds on every flaw you think you have and explores your weakness to the fullest. It is destructive. So, stop the inner voice that keeps saying you are not good enough. You will not make it. You are a failure. 

How do you combat self-doubt?

Start by addressing your traumas. Look, everyone is wounded. It’s the degree that differs. Do yourself a favour and start your inner healing journey. Try positive self-affirmation. Meditate on quotes, speeches, or verses that speak about your abilities. Mirror therapy also works wonders. 

Just like you learned to doubt yourself, you can unlearn it. But you have to commit to the journey since it’s a lifelong process. Commit to always speaking life. 

Laziness

Often laziness comes disguised as “busy.” We love branding and repackaging it to convince ourselves that we are doing something when, in essence, we are wasting time—being lazy. 

Laziness is when you can’t apply for a job because the application process is long. It’s refusing to work hard because sitting back is comfortable. Laziness is spending hours on social media instead of sharpening your skills. It’s sleeping like you look forward to seeing your maker, yet you haven’t fulfilled your purpose. 

Laziness is characterized by complaints, shortcuts, procrastination, and low performance. It’s where you feel comfortable, not because you’ve earned it, but because you are too complacent.

To get out of this ditch, sleep with a goal in mind. Write this goal down. What is it that you want to accomplish this week? How about today? If you write your to-do list overnight, there are high chances it will drive you to wake up on time and get going. 

On the other hand, sleeping like a baby without a clear objective of what you want to accomplish tomorrow is a recipe for a disorganized day with low energy, exactly what we are trying to prevent. 

Lack of self-love

Is loving yourself more than you love others selfish? I would say no, it’s not. Jesus loved us so much that He gave up His life for us. So, you don’t have to do the same.

Step back from this self-appointed role and ask yourself, suppose you direct the energy, time, and commitment you give others to yourself, how far will you go? If you are willing to go a mile for someone else, ensure you can go two miles for yourself. 

Now, don’t get this twisted. Helping others is okay. Committing your energy, time, and resources to the well-being of others is great. However, before you drain the well dry, make sure you are refilling it. Again, love your neighbour as you love yourself. You can’t give what you don’t have. 

When you love yourself, you won’t succumb to laziness. Distractive thoughts will be a thing of the past. You can say yes or no to projects, ideas, or people, depending on whether or not they add value to your life. You can commit to your goals and work towards achieving them because it’s for you. 

One more time

Are you willing to pay the price? Can you wake up every morning with a renewed energy to step up, defile all odds, and go for your heart’s desire? 

Kipchoge Keino once said no human is limited. True to his statement, Kipchoge broke the 26.2 miles marathon record and finished at 1 hour 59 minutes, the fastest in history. 

You and I were busy cheering him (which is patriotic, by the way). He made us proud. We drummed on social media how we are not limited and printed t-shirts and anything that could remind us of this remarkable achievement. But we failed at one thing, to replicate this ideology in our daily life. As always, our hype was short-lived. 

So, as we journey this year, let’s refuse the mediocrity that we’ve convinced ourselves is normal. Let’s commit to trying one more time. Let’s demand more from ourselves because, by design, we have what it takes to reach our full potential.  

Mourine Odongo
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